why iʻm juicing

hi. iʻm on a juice fast. yes, itʻs a trend. yah, iʻm sure it will die down. no, itʻs not my first juice fast. yes, iʻll probably do it again. no, not all of the juices are tasty. yes, iʻm doing it to lose weight.

so hereʻs the thing... i like me. iʻm beautiful. (in every single way...) i donʻt have body image issues. if iʻm wearing shorts at the beach itʻs because i didnʻt shave, not because iʻm trying to hide my white and thighs. iʻm of the opinion that a body, no matter its appearance, is amazing. i like my body. always have.

that said, my body is almost twice the size it was before kids. yah, seriously. like quarter-pounder to half-pounder, like 6 oz juice box to 12 oz can, like toddler feet to teenage feet. like size 4 to size... wait a second. why donʻt clothing sizes double with body size??

why i want the smaller body back: CLOTHES i like a certain style of clothes, and that style doesnʻt fit a larger physique.YOGA. i like yoga. yoga is not made for people with heft. some of the positions are literally impossible... HUSBAND. he doesnʻt care much. but i want to give him back the wife he married, with the cut abs and such. CHILDREN. reason numero uno. i want them to learn a healthy lifestyle. an active lifestyle. a whole foods lifestyle. i want them to develop healthy habits. and i am their mommy... it starts with me.

oh, and i turn 30 this year, so when i meet Marcus Mumford at a concert in London, and then heʻll be like, "wow, youʻre great at piano, and you know all our songs. wanna join the band?" and iʻll be like, "wow, yah! thatʻd be awesome!! what about Ben?" (the current piano/accordian player...) and heʻll be like, "oh, Ben is gonna play the mandolin and fiddle now." and so Iʻll say, "YES!" and then theyʻll change their names to Mumford and Sons and Daughter. yah, when that happens i wanna be healthy enough to sing and dance around on stage without losing my breath.